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Thursday, March 24, 2011

Supa Dupa Rugby Round-up with Francois “Chocolate Lovin’” Badenhorst.

Yeah son, it’s time for a dose of southern hemisphere all up in your computer screen. Let’s roll.
The round kicked off in Hamilton with the undefeated Sharks playing the yet to win Chiefs. Inclement weather ruined what could have been one hell of a spectacle and the Chiefs won a good ole fashioned all penalty dust up 15-9. The game was less boom boom pow and more kerplunk kerplunk fizzle and no one in particular stood out because of the drab nature of the contest. The ‘Canes and the Blues faced off in a far more exciting matchup which ended 41-17 in favour of the Blue man group. Blues winger Rene Ranger further proved that he is the freaking man this week with another great display. With his small stature, afro and straggly Che Guevara beard he is the most exciting winger in Super Rugby right now. Jerome Kaino also put in another workmanlike performance for the Blues. A Hurricanes player that deserves a mention is their young winger Peter Savea, all 120 KG’s of the bastard. When he runs he looks like a rage filled giraffe that has just escaped from some form of captivity. It really is an amazing sight. In the last game played on NZed soil was The Highlanders v The Crusaders. Yet another team travelled to Nelson this week and yet another team got treated like I would if I walked into the Rangers side of Glasgow and shouted “Fuck da queen”. The ‘Saders were merciless and ran out 44-13 winners over a very good Highlanders team. ‘Saders inside centre Sonny Bill Williams is the king of offloads and is in great nick heading into 2k11.
From Australia I bring news of a rugby miracle. The Cheetahs, the hopelessly incapable away from home Cheetahs, beat the Waratahs in Sydney 23-3. Only 2 South African teams have ever won in Sydney and now the boys from Bloemfontein join that illustrious group. I’d say that before the game there were greater odds on a no result caused by an asteroid impact than the odds on the Cheetahs grabbing the victory. But alas, they did win and the returning Heinrich Brussow was absolutely inspirational. He pilfered, he ran, he tackled ad nauseam and will be one of the most important members of the Bok squad heading to the RWC 2011. The other game played in Oz, the country not the TV show prison, was between the resurgent Reds and the Melbourne Rebels. The game was basically a no contest and the Reds ran out 53-3 victors. The whole Reds team deserves a mention as it was an awesome team performance to destroy the Rubbles like they did.
In yet another unlikely twist the Stormers scored a try! Wow. Just wow. I’m just gonna let it sink in a bit... yeah. Anyway they beat the struggling Bulls at Loftus 23-13 and are the only undefeated team in all of Super Rugby. Stormers centre pair Jean De Villiers and Jaque Fourie completely out matched their Bulls counterparts and no.8 Duane Vermeulen was his usual abrasive self. This was an important psychological victory for the men from the Cape as they lost to the Bulls in the final last year. Meanwhile in Jo’burg, the bi-polar Lions again followed up a victory with a horrible display against the Western Force. They lost the game 27-15 and solidified their reputation as the most inconsistent team in world rugby. They are about as reliable as Charlie Sheen. James O’Connor was strong for the Force. He was always creative and marshalled his team like a boss.
To quote me some Looney Tunes, th-th-th-thats all folks! SEE YOU NEXT WEEK GODDAMNIT.

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