IT’S SUPER RUGBY ROUND 7. That’s how excited I am about this roundup; I wrote the entire first sentence in capitals. When caps lock comes out then you know shits about to go down.
Over in NZ, The Cheetahs rocked up to Auckland to play the high flying Blues. Unsurprisingly they lost but surprisingly by a narrow margin. The final score was 29-22 in favour of the Blues which is quite impressive considering the Cheetahs are literally the world’s most injured rugby team. Cheetah’s scrumhalf Sarel Pretorius played out of his shoes again and it is only a matter of time before one of the bigger South African teams sign his ass up. The Blues were unconvincing it must be said, they shoulda bagged this game by 30 points easily. A bright spot for them, however, is Luke “Thunder Thighs” McAllister who is playing like a boss. The Bulls ran out 26-14 over the Hurricanes in a much needed victory for them. The ‘Canes have been majorly disappointing this year and their season is spiralling outta control faster than a heroin addicts life. The Bulls still aren’t their usual selves but showed their experience and grinded out the W. The Highlanders eked a tight contest against the Brumbies at Invercargill winning 26-20. The Brumbies join the Hurricanes in the flop stakes this season as well losing another game with their Wallaby laden team. The Highlander’s on the other hand are getting everything they deserve. They play their footie hard and fair and should grab a lot more wins this year, especially at home.
THE REBELS WON TWO IN A ROW! Caps lock is back, son. That’s when you know I’m serious. They beat the Force 26-25 and I gotta say I’m fairly happy for them. They played well again this week and seem to be starting to string some performances together. Rebels flanker Jarrod Saffy is sticking up his dirty Australian hand for a Wallaby jumper with another strong performance this game. He has made the most tackles in the whole of Super Rugby this year and has a workrate matched only by a Indonesian sweat shop worker. The Waratahs beat the Chiefs 23-16 in a major league bore-a-thon. The problem with the ‘Tahs is that they seem more worried about not losing rather than winning. That mentality is gonna bite them in the ass... oh wait it already has, they lost to the fucking Cheetahs.
What is there to say about the Stormer’s defence that hasn’t all ready been said? It is utterly impregnable (in fact here’s a picture of the Stormer’s defence in action
The Sharks were the latest team to find this out on Saturday as they lost 16-6. I literally cannot write enough about what it’s like to watch the Stormer’s tackle teams into submission. They’re like a pack of hyenas torturing a lion cub to death. It might not be as entertaining as watching the Crusader’s slice and dice their way through opponents but it is just as impressive. On a side note, WHAT A MATCH THE CRUSADERS V THE STORMERS’S IS GONNA BE. See caps lock again. I’m super serious. The Lions lost again. I know. Shocker. This time they actually threw it away against the Reds losing 30-25 after surging into an early lead. Quintessential Lions. The Reds centre Digby Ioane is playing like a champ these days. He loves beating defenders more than I like randomly shouting the word penis in awkward situations (Note: and that’s a whole lot).
That is that for round 7. C u guyz nxt week lol xXx. CAPS LOCK.
I've been called the voice of my generation.
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